Video Game Review: Bad Dudes (NES)

If you don’t like 8-bit, 2D, side scrolling, beat’em up video games, you’re probably lame.

Bad Dudes was one of the best. I preferred the arcade version, as it was graphically superior but the home console version for the Nintendo Entertainment System was still a hell of a lot of fun. Especially, with that 64 lives code. It’s pretty damn hard without that.

While I would consider the original Double Dragon a superior game, this one had the benefit of ninjas and the title character of the video game Karnov as one of its bosses.

All the boss battles in this were pretty unique and fun though. The only weak one was probably the second level boss, which was just a tiny midget dude that has claws like Vega from Street Fighter II.

This game has solid levels for the genre. None of them are designed great but you go from the city streets, to fighting on the top of moving semi trucks and trains, into the sewers, out into the country and finally into a big warehouse full of ninjas and all the bosses you already beat.

Some games can be simple and work and that’s exactly what Bad Dudes is. You walk, you punch, you kick and you steal weapons from ninjas you kick the crap out of. What’s not to love?

Rating: 8.75/10
Pairs well with: other ’80s beat’em up games like Double Dragon and its sequels, RenegadeCrime Fighters, Final Fight, River City Ransom, Streets of Rage and its sequels, etc.

Comic Review: Daredevil: Back In Black, Vol. 2: Supersonic

Published: September 14th, 2016
Written by: Charles Soule, Roger McKenzie
Art by: Matteo Buffagni, Vanesa R. Del Ray, Goran Sudzuka, Bill Sienkiewicz (cover)

Marvel Comics, 124 Pages

Review:

While I’ve praised Charles Soule’s run on Daredevil, this early stuff isn’t working for me.

I came into Soule’s run towards the end of it and I really liked the last few arcs. Here, though, he is bogged down by the writer before him, who made it so that no one knew Daredevil’s secret identity. It’s a weird plot device that comes up constantly in this volume and it’s pretty annoying.

This collection is made up of multiple short story arcs.

The first deals with Elektra showing up, looking for a daughter no one knew she had. Apparently, after about 50 pages, the daughter angle was a trick and the story ended up being completely pointless.

The second arc is all about Matt Murdock playing Texas Hold’em in Macao. You don’t know what his scheme is but it ends with him and Spider-Man hunting down a briefcase. It’s pretty dull and the dialogue was bad.

The third part of this scant 124 page collection is the Daredevil annual from that year, which has a short story revolving around Echo and another that pits Daredevil against the Gladiator.

Reading this felt like a complete waste of time. I’m sure that these stories were there to plant seeds for later plot developments but this feels like total filler.

Additionally, the art in the Elektra story was bad. And then in the Texas Hold’em tale, there is a scene where Spidey and Daredevil go parasailing behind a hydrofoil. Except they aren’t using parachutes. Um… you have to use a parachute, otherwise parasailing doesn’t work. Growing up in Florida, I understand the simple physics of parasailing. The human body is not a natural parachute no matter how fast the boat is going.

I wanted to read through the earlier Soule Daredevil stuff but man, this really destroyed my motivation.

Also, I hate the black Daredevil suit.

Rating: 5/10
Pairs well with: the other Charles Soule story arcs on Daredevil.

Comic Review: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero: Silent Option

Published: September 19th, 2018 – March 13th, 2019
Written by: Larry Hama, Ryan Ferrier
Art by: Netho Diaz, Kenneth Loh
Based on: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero by Hasbro

IDW Publishing, 151 Pages

Review:

This four-part miniseries is the latest G.I. Joe story from longtime G.I. Joe writer Larry Hama. It is also the first IDW G.I. Joe story that I’ve read in several months, as I was starting to get burnt out on the franchise due to how IDW has handled it since Chuck Dixon and Mike Costa left the series.

Larry Hama is still writing the regular ongoing series that started at Marvel in the early ’80s but it just doesn’t have the same magic it used to and so much has changed for the worse that I don’t much care for Hama’s ongoing continuity even though his work, decades ago, is what initially got me into buying comic books to begin with.

I wanted to check this out, though. The main reason is that I’ve been yearning for a good G.I. Joe story and this miniseries is centered around Helix, a modern character but one I came to love in the IDW rebooted continuity. I know, I know, these multiple continuities can get confusing but I believe that this is technically Helix’s first appearance in the original Hama continuity, so I wanted to see how it played out.

Overall, her story was good but this complete story arc was pretty mundane. I’m an old school fan, so the lack of Cobra in this story sucked, as did the lack of old school Joes. Sure, the story featured Firefly but the villain was generic and just had some red ninjas to do her bidding and on the Joe side we got Alpine and tiny cameos from Hawk, Cutter and Shipwreck but this was pretty much a new Joe team featuring characters that are poor recreations of iconic Joe members.

Hell, we get two new versions of Snake Eyes here but neither of them are even 5 percent as cool as the original. I don’t dig the girl Snake Eyes and it seems like a cheap attempt by IDW at trying to create their own X-23 type of character. For those that don’t know, X-23 was a female clone of Wolverine in Marvel Comics titles.

I thought the art was mostly good and this had a harder edge to it than most of Hama’s G.I. Joe stories, as it dealt with human sex trafficking, but it lacked in badass points when compared to the Dixon and Costa G.I. Joe stories from the IDW reboot continuity.

This wasn’t a complete waste of time but it didn’t do much to motivate me to give G.I. Joe a seventeenth chance.

Rating: 6.25/10
Pairs well with: any of the Larry Hama G.I. Joe stuff at IDW.

Comic Review: Street Angel: After School Kung Fu Special

Published: April 26th, 2017
Written by: Brian Maruca, Jim Rugg
Art by: Jim Rugg

Image Comics, 43 Pages

Review:

I’ve been aware of the Street Angel comic for a few years but I wasn’t too familiar with Jim Rugg until seeing him on Cartoonist Kayfabe alongside Ed Piskor (and sometimes Tom Scioli). Since then, I’ve come to admire his style and his opinion on comics, especially his recommendations.

This is the first Street Angel title I picked up and it was a lot of fun. It’s an easy, quick read at 43 pages.

I thought that the story was cute and energetic and I loved the art style, overall.

The plot deals with middle schooler Jesse Sanchez, who goes to the worst school in the worst ghetto of Angel City. She’s a homeless skateboarder and a badass martial artist. She fights all types of villains but here, she deals with a male bully in a fight after school.

None of the comic books share any actual continuity, from what I understand, but that’s fine, as each story is self-contained and works well on its own and doesn’t require any knowledge from other Street Angel tales.

Ultimately, this was a cool comic. If I’m being honest, I wish it were a bit longer or that the story somehow carried on in another release, as it ends in a place where you want to see what develops next between Jesse and the bully due to the result of their fight.

There are a lot of ongoing comics that don’t have enough meat and potatoes to justify them carrying on past a single arc. This, however, could benefit from that, as I like the characters and want to get to know them more intimately.

Rating: 7.25/10
Pairs well with: other Street Angel comics, as well as Jim Rugg’s other work.

Comic Review: IDW 20/20 – Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Published: January 16th, 2019
Written by: Paul Allor
Art by: Dave Wachter
Based on: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles by Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird

IDW Publishing, 33 Pages

Review:

There’s five of these IDW 20/20 comics but this is the third and final one I’m going to read and review. I already checked out the Star Trek and Ghostbusters ones but I don’t have much interest in the ones for Jem and My Little Pony.

This kind of fits the mold of the other two, as it features characters most people love but it doesn’t tell a complelling story that seems to have much purpose outside of the IDW 20/20 gimmick, which sees beloved franchises either flashback or fast forward twenty years.

All of these could have probably been better if they weren’t one-shots and had room to breathe and tell a more coherent story with proper character development and world building.

This takes place in Europe, twenty years into the future where the Turtles pretty much look and act the same. They’re fighting a war against Krang’s alien race and that’s pretty much it. It’s just Turtles fighting a bunch of Krangs, a Technodrome shows up and there’s not much to grab on to or care about.

The art is decent, the action is okay, it entertained me slightly for fifteen minutes but overall, this is a throwaway “elseworlds” tale.

Rating: 5.75/10
Pairs well with: other IDW 20/20 comics, as well as Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles comics.

Comic Review: Daredevil: Back In Black, Vol. 1: Chinatown

Published: May 11th, 2016
Written by: Charles Soule
Art by: Ron Garney

Marvel Comics, 115 Pages

Review:

I really came to like Charles Soule’s run on Daredevil towards the end. But that’s also where I picked it up, after having taken a few years off. So I wanted to go back and start from the beginning and build back up towards the end, so I could re-read the conclusion, The Death of Daredevil, with more context.

This first story arc was just okay. It didn’t blow me away and I wasn’t familiar with the bad guy, which doesn’t really matter because his whole story is basically wrapped up by the end of this.

We get to meet a character named Blindspot, that works as a sort of sidekick in training to Daredevil. He’s the second Marvel character with that name but this version was created by Charles Soule. He’s a gymnast from China and an illegal immigrant with a mother that’s tied to the story’s villain, Tenfingers. Blindspot’s story is fairly interesting but I’ll also have to see where things lead, as you barely get to know him here.

The one thing that really stands out about this comic book is the art of Ron Garney. It blends a very gritty, neo-noir style with almost Hong Kong cinema influences. I really like it, as well as how he uses vibrant colors, a heavy chiaroscuro style contrast and some half tone shading.

This is a good looking comic but the story didn’t hit the mark for me. I’m assuming that this will continue to build into something more substantial and meaningful as it rolls on beyond this volume. As I said in the beginning, I was a fan of Soule’s Daredevil work in the later stories.

Rating: 6.75/10
Pairs well with: the other Charles Soule story arcs on Daredevil.

Film Review: Mortal Kombat: Annihilation (1997)

Also known as: Mortal Kombat 2 (Uruguay), Mortal Kombat: Destruction Finale (France)
Release Date: November 21st, 1997
Directed by: John R. Leonetti
Written by: Brent V. Friedman, Bryce Zabel, Lawrence Kasanoff, Joshua Wexler, John Tobias
Based on: Mortal Kombat by Midway Games
Music by: George S. Clinton, various
Cast: Robin Shou, Talisa Soto, Brian Thompson, Sandra Hess, Lynn Red Williams, Irina Pantaeva, James Remar, Ray Park, Tony Jaa (stunts)

Threshhold Entertainment, New Line Cinema, 95 Minutes

Review:

“Mother! You’re alive!” – Kitana, “Too bad you… will die!” – Sindel

I think that the original Mortal Kombat movie is pretty terrible, despite having a lot of friends that have some sort of nostalgic love for it. I was a hardcore Mortal Kombat fan, as far as the games were concerned, but the movie just didn’t resonate with me. Sure, maybe it was better than the film adaptations of Double Dragon or Super Mario Bros. but that in no way makes it good, as both of those films were beyond awful.

Well, the sequel Mortal Kombat: Annihilation makes its extremely flawed predecessor look like The Empire Strikes Back by comparison.

I avoided this movie for most of my adult life but once it was available to stream on Hulu, recently, I thought that I’d finally give it a watch because at least I’d get a review out of it.

If I’m being honest, this was damn hard to sit through. It’s a baffling movie, littered with special effects that are absolute junk, a script so bad that canaries would commit sepukku rather than shit on it and acting so atrocious that it’s kind of depressing seeing Brian Thompson and James Remar stumbling through their scenes.

It took me four sittings to get through this movie and usually I power through even the worst motion pictures in one. This just sucked away at my soul like a starved psychic vampire and I needed to take breaks from it and recharge.

This is certainly one of the worst movies I have ever seen. It isn’t the worst but that’s only because I sometimes spend a lot of time searching the bottom of the dumpster in that little rusted out back corner where even garbage doesn’t dare go.

But this may be the worst film I’ve seen that actually had some sort of budget. Somehow, this cost $30 million dollars. I’m not sure where that money went as I’ve seen better special effects in an elementary school play. If New Line Cinema was so quick to throw their money down the drain in 1997, I should have asked for a check. I could’ve at least made a better looking movie for a lot less and then pocketed the rest.

Never watch this film unless you hate yourself. I heard that Gitmo used this to torture terror suspects before it was considered too inhumane. That’s when they switched to waterboarding.

Rating: 0.5/10
Pairs well with: Other mediocre but mostly crappy movies based off of fighting games: Mortal KombatStreet FighterStreet Fighter: The Legend of Chun-LiTekken and Tekken 2: Kazuya’s Revenge.