Film Review: Ninja Academy (1989)

Release Date: August 17th, 1989 (UK, video)
Directed by: Nico Mastorakis
Written by: Jonathan D. Gift
Music by: Jerry Grant
Cast: Will Egan, Gerald Okamura, Kelly Randall

Omega Entertainment, 88 Minutes

Review:

“[his only line, after punching a ninja] That’s one dumb son of a bitch.” – The Mime

This is one of those movies that I used to catch on one of the premium cable channels, late at night, when I was like twelve. I thought it was funny enough to watch multiple times when I was that young but I also loved the Police Academy movies and all the other “Academy” films that came out trying to emulate it’s style and success.

While this isn’t as good as the first four or five Police Academy movies, it is at least better than the worst one.

That being said, this involves two rival ninja schools. One is run by an asshole American and has competent ninjas, the other is run by a virtuous Japanese master and his daughter with a new crew of ninjas that are all fish out of water, tripping over their own feet.

As these things go, the bumbling newbs are a joke but they have to band together and overcome the real challenge that awaits them. Eventually, there is a big ninja academy showdown and the losers have to rise to the occasion and become the winners. We’ve all seen a version of this story a hundred times… or, at least, I have.

Anyway, each of the main characters has some sort of gimmick or personality trait that makes them basic archetypes. There’s the cool guy, the cool girl, the slutty girl, the gun nut, the nerd, a fucking mime and a few others. Man, I loved the fucking ninja mime and the the war veteran, gun nut, who was actually a coward… until he wasn’t.

Overall, this is a bad movie and a dumb movie and the vast majority of modern filmgoers will probably hate it. I don’t… but I also really liked these sort of movies way back and it’s definitely not the worst of them.

Although, the fight choreography is beyond atrocious.

Rating: 4/10