Film Review: Phantasm: Ravager (2016)

Also known as: Phantasm V: Ravager (trailer title), Reggie Tales (working title), Fantasma: Devastador (Brazil)
Release Date: September 25th, 2016 (Fantastic Fest)
Directed by: David Hartman
Written by: Don Coscarelli
Music by: Christopher L. Stone
Cast: Reggie Bannister, Michael Baldwin, Bill Thornbury, Angus Scrimm, Gloria Lynne Henry, Kathy Lester, Dawn Cody, Stephen Jutras, Daniel Roebuck, Daniel Schweiger

Well Go Entertainment, 85 Minutes

Review:

“Your playthings don’t work here. You could leave this rat race if you chose, and be with your family again, but my generosity is fleeting. You’ll have no more chances beyond this moment. Do you think I want your reanimated zombies?” – The Tall Man

Well, this is the end of the road and what a confusing road it has become.

If you thought things went really wonky in the fourth movie, this one doesn’t really answer any questions, it just confuses you even more and you never really know what the hell is actually happening or the why behind it.

One interpretation of this could be that it was all a big hallucination during Reggie’s final moments before death. Another is that this is real but that the Tall Man is just tricking Reggie. By the end of it, I don’t fucking care and this chapter felt completely unnecessary even if the fourth one left audiences hanging nearly twenty years earlier. Really, I just kind of accepted the fourth’s ending as the mysterious ending where the audience’s imagination just needed to take over and ponder the mystery.

I don’t dislike this film though.

Ultimately, it feels like this franchise should’ve wrapped up with a more cohesive miniseries or a television season, as opposed to wedging all this madness into a film that ends at a weak 75 minutes (not including credits and a short bonus scene within the credits).

This chapter in the franchise felt like one of those weird filler episodes thrown into a long television season where the writers get overly pretentious and artsy and try to turn the story into something more serious than it needs to be. Truthfully, it’s just a mess of a film, attempting to be smarter than it should be and losing sight of what it needs to be: a final fucking chapter in a franchise that started out great.

The special effects were a mixed bag but this was a film made with next to no budget and filmed in secret.

The acting was pretty much what you would expect from a fifth film in a horror franchise that’s a notch or two below mainstream entertainment.

I was glad to see the key characters come back, even the surprise edition of Rocky in that mid-credits bonus scene. I also liked the new additions to the cast: Dawn Cody and Stephen Jutras, who is a wisecracking badass dwarf not afraid to grab a titty.

The high point of the film is seeing Angus Scrimm’s final performance. Without the Tall Man, you can’t really have a Phantasm picture and recasting him would be like recasting Robert Englund as Freddy Krueger and that happened once and we all saw how bad it was. Scrimm’s lines in this were fantastic and that scene with the Tall Man and the heroes, separated by a chasm, was really damn cool.

I had really hoped that a fifth and final film would connect some dots and flesh out the cool mythos a bit more but all it did was kick the dots all over the place and erase some of the lines that were already drawn. This hurt my head.

I wanted to love you Phantasm V but you’ve become like that girl I always go back to for a good time but get trapped doing chores around her apartment to the point that I’m too tired for sex and settle for a half assed handy while I sip warm beer.

Rating: 5/10
Pairs well with: The other Phantasm films.

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